Crayons Can Melt on Us for All I Care

Hello again my friends!!!!

SO the Das Boot night pictures are FINALLY HERE!!!

YYYYAAAAAYYYY

Our photographer had left by the time we had gotten to the Karaoke Kid unfortunately, but I'll give ya what i can!


So this is Me, Andy, and Drew drinking from the ol' boot!! Drew is really good at it.
Too good perhaps. Relax the jaw Drew, relax the jaw and swallow ;)


Ya know, in hindsight, i wish we would have captured the massive difficulty everyone had while they were trying to get past the bubble in the toe! Because that is a totally legitimate difficulty, and you have to be either ultra confident in addition to having seen the movie Beerfest, or SUPER careful! And on the first time around, the whole circle was a strange mix of the two, resulting in beer slapping us all in the face. SHAAAAAMMMMEE. We had 3 boots between the 5 of us. it was some really good times!!

AND THEN I FOUND BRUCE WILLIS!!! ZOMG!!

Andy spotted him toward the middle of the night, and made everyone look at him. I was determined to get a picture with him in a discrete manner, but in the end i got frustrated and a little too drunk, so i just walked up to him and said something to the effect of, hey Bruce Willis, will you take a picture with me? And then he said yes. LOL. What a sport.

The other day (2 weeks ago?) Andy and I went out to dinner with our friend Ashley for her birthday at Uno's in Madison. We had been seated, and were just chatting amongst ourselves when our waitress skipped over (and i'm barely exaggerating here) and introduced herself. She gave us the usual hello, my name is... but when she got to her name, she drew this napkin out of her little check pouch dealie (whatever that's called) and with a MASSIVE flourish, she set it gently, almost lovingly on the table. It had her name on it (Rachel), and she timed it such that as she said it, the napkin was landing. And then she got this look on her face that told me she was hungry for approval, like she was a kindergartner, and she needed me to tell her that the picture of the pink duck she had colored was really splendid and original.

I literally laughed right in her face. Which i immediately regretted due to the hurt look on HER face, but what was i supposed to do? She had colored outside the lines, and what kind of ducks are pink anyway? Have i taken this metaphor too far? The point is, she wasn't going to get her approval from me. On the plus side, i wasn't her most abrasive customer. One of our other friends made a fuss about portion sizes, and ended up sending her food back (lol Stacey, fight the man).

Andy and I beat Gears of War 2 today!! Truthfully, Andy beat it by himself for the most part. The campaign bored me a little, and the co op campaign is set up so i can come and go as i please, so i did. The end was pretty anti-climactic, and I'm not gonna lie, the game is getting old for me. If you have any leisure activity suggestions, I'm up for something new! (disclaimer: the multiplayer option for this game was truly wonderful, we just played it for a lot of hours, and I'm ready to move on to bigger and better things. Or bigger and better games.)

And now its question answerin' time!
Lauren, I'm not super impressed with your questions. Very low energy, I can tell you didn't put much thought into them. That being said prepare for them to be answered in PAINSTAKING LENGTH!!

First of all, I'm not a huge Bagel eater. But if i did eat them regularly i would probably... wait, wtf is a SALT bagel? ish. i guess poppy, given those options? Whatever. But when i eat bagels, its like... i dunno, this is gonna sound really lazy, but they're hard to chew. I get about halfway through 'em, and then I'm pretty much sick of chewing. Also, they don't have much flavor. You need to douse them in cream cheese to make them enjoyable. In fact, when I eat bagels, i make them into sandwiches more often than not. And even then i would almost rather have bread. The extra stuff in the middle of the bagel doesnt make it any easier to chew after all.

And the meaning of life. I suppose i would say the meaning of life is to develop relationships with those around us. We are here on Earth for a very limited time, and as one of my favorite Relient K songs says, "Our hearts are all we'll get to bring, so let's go ahead and make them worth something!" O by the way, I believe in God and heaven, and while I am currently spiritually speaking a bit further from Him than I'm comfortable with, I will be reconnecting very soon. Feel free to ask me about my beliefs if you are curious.

O and speaking of questions, i didn't actually tell you what they were, but that's partially because they were kind of silly (or vague and cliche). They were in the comments of yesterday's post. However if you have something you wanna know about me/hear me talk about, throw a comment on this thing, and i'll get to you tomorrow! or maybe Friday, Ive got a paper to work on.

http://xkcd.com/406/

"It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, gently wafting curtains"

I am exhausted this evening, so this blog may be brief.

I don't know if i can muster the strength to be funny this evening, so instead, this post will be more of a get to know Nick post.

I've never been in love. I've dated, and I've had random party make outs, and I've had random party make outs that end in dating, but nothing too terribly serious.

I am a recovering terrible student. Homework is almost impossible to do until i reach panicked, night before it's due mode. It's not conducive to good grades. I'm working on it.

My favorite beer is New Glarus Spotted Cow. You can't buy it in Minnesota, and this makes me very sad. I am sippin' on one as i type this.

I don't have a 'type' per se. I guess we can start here: I like girls. It baffles me that certain hair colors or eye colors so greatly affect people's attraction to other people. HOWEVER that being said, I DO find myself less attracted to Asian girls. I don't know what it is. There are a few exceptions, but in general... not for me.

I am fascinated by objects (and specifically animals) that are larger than i am. Whales, SHARKS, sky scrapers, transformers, DINOSAURS, jungle cats, etc. Remember that scene from the new King Kong movie where king kong fights off like 3 t rexes?!?! totally awesome.

Things that swarm frighten me/creep me out. New Indiana Jones film, with the ants or whatever? I know, most of you are trying to pretend they didn't make the new movie, but I'm kind of a sucker for Shia. And shameless action flicks.

I would really love to write a book. However, what with this blog, schoolwork, REGULAR work, and screwing around, i simply can't find the time. Also, i get the feeling i would REALLY love it, and try to like, make a career out of it, and if i did THAT, well... why did i even go to college? Lord knows my writing skills haven't much improved over the course of my Madison experience. I'll get to it eventually. As a side project.

OK, I'm too lazy to add fun links and pictures and such. Maybe i can do some REALLY cool things tomorrow to make up for it? ok sweet, it's a deal!

Ciao!

Bad Hair Day

Today I am insecure.

. . .

I woke to find that yesterday should definitely have been laundry day. All of my stylish/socially acceptable pants were dirty, leaving me with these jeans that are too small in every dimension. They are neither attractive nor comfortable. Cleanliness is really all they have going for them. Also, the best of my 3 shirts available is a long sleeve t shirt with a biblical message on it. Not only have i passed the phase of my life where i believe i can influence people's opinions/thoughts/faith through a witty shirt, "long sleeve" was in this case rather a loose term. In addition, in my weakened state of self-esteem, i noticed that my hair is getting far too long and unruly, and i should have shaved before classes. HOWEVER, now all of that is over, and i can remedy some of the aforementioned issues.

My friend corey made a note that something very important was missing from my favorite shows list: Firefly. Corey, all i can say to you is that i must have repressed all memory of the show during the horrible depression i felt upon learning there would be no more seasons.

For those of you unaware, Firefly is a really wonderful show. If there's even a tiny touch of geekiness in you... well, you should already have seen it. It was cancelled after its first season due to a Fox network scheduling snafu, leaving countless questions completely unanswered, and countless geeks unimaginably disappointed. Thankfully, Joss Whedon agreed to make a movie a few years later, which was nowheres near as good as the TV series, but did its best to wrap up a few of the hundreds of loose ends the show had left.

I thought i was gonna be done talking about Firefly after that paragraph, but i've changed my mind. Its a show about SPACE COWBOYS essentially! They run around doing heroic and morally questionable things! Actually, they may be more akin to space pirates...

AND look at the female cast of this show!!


I was gonna put pictures of all the hot girls that are featured at some point or another in Firefly, but I'm trying not to lose all 2 of my female subscribers in one fell swoop. I'm including Christina Hendricks because... well LOOK at her!! Her breasts are friggin' larger than her head! EACH ONE is larger than her head!! She is outrageously proportioned!! In a good way. (I know this is becoming a pattern, but i swear, this isn't going to turn into 'Nick's Hot Chick of the Day', just stay with me lol)

But so long as we are being misogynistic, while i was at work this evening, one of my friends told me that from birth, a newborn infant's eyes are the size they will always be, while a person's nose and ears continue to grow throughout their lifetime. Initially, this caused me to think, 'well, i suppose that's why some people age better than others. Their ears and nose didn't grow too fast.'

When i made this declaration to my friend, he asked if i thought mouths grew throughout one's lifetime as well, at which point i noted that when a baby is born, their mouth is juuuuuuust big enough to fit a nipple in! And if our mouths remained baby sized, we would surely starve to death. And THAT'S when it hit me! ... We are doing it wrong...

I'm on a roll? Hey, why are girls stupid? because they suck at sports!

Honestly now. I'm done pandering to my male readership
I might not be. Dont worry guys, everyone knows men have better vision than women

So this past weekend i got pretty drunk, and upon returning home to the apartment, i got the hiccups. I decided the only way to get rid of them was holding my breath until they went away. I held my breath until i passed out. So... VICTORY!!! NO MOAR HICCUPS! And i got a nap in! A really long one.

Alright, have a lovely day everyone. I'm off to go be responsible!!

"Braveheart: they should have just called it Moon Titties!"

Good evening friends!! Andy and i have FINALLY finished watching Braveheart (last night got a little... distracted. however in addition to remembering just how good the movie is, i NOTICED SOMETHING whilst checking yesterday's post, and i'ma break it for you now!!







DO YOU SEE IT?!?!?!?! RIGHT THERE!!







Awesome.
Moving on.










I also began watching season three of Arrested Development this afternoon, and it was SO BRILLIANT!! I honestly havent even seen most of season 2 truthfully, but this show is just SO well written. Everything ties together and... man, i'm really geekin' out about it right now.

While we are on excellent TV shows, here, these are my current/all time favorites in order to the best of my abilities from my favorite to... well, my very slightly less favorite.

-How I Met Your Mother
-The Office (seasons 2, 3, and 4)
-Arrested Development
-Big Bang Theory
-Heroes (Season 1)
-Family Guy (about 3 years ago and before)

If you trust me - and you definitely should - and if you haven't seen the shows i just listed, please please PLEASE!!! Go watch them right now. In the order specified. You may stop at Arrested Development if you like. I can accept 50%. Also, the bottom 3 are a bit geekier. Well, not Family Guy, but you know what i mean. You're pickin' up what i'm puttin' down.

Also, last night with Das Boot and Karaoke Kid was a HUGE success!! Unfortunately as I was not the photographer for the evening, the photos are not yet available to me, and without them i really think the story may be... Well, I just think it will be infinitely more amusing with visual aids. And since I'm the one in charge, we are waiting til tomorrow for the story!!

i was gonna end it here, but I've decided in the spirit of convincing you to watch my favorite TV shows that i'm gonna throw some clips in here at the end! Enjoi.

How i met your mother
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I9l83B_r1_A&NR=1

The Office (this one's a little long. I'm not sorry.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Pw_eX97TUw

Big Bang Theory
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uBj7-50bloE

And finally (I'm sorry this has no relevance to anything but) CHECK THIS OUT!!! Hours of distraction.
http://inudge.net/index.en.html

"If you HAD to do a gay guy, i guess Neil Patrick Harris..."

My roommate Andy is a movie buff, and in addition, a film major.

He has not seen Braveheart.

SO in the interest of enriching his life, broadening his horizons, diversifying his portfolio, and welcoming him into manhood, we will be watching said moviefilm this evening. And thank god. I mean, in addition to being a classic epic movie, spanning a lifetime of oppression and colonialism, it arguably contains Mel Gibson's best torture scene!





O, and there's that one smokin' hot french chick.
<-----




In other news! I went to the badger football game today (as i am wont to do. gotta love that Camp Randall!) and there was this massive doucher (in this case, the adjective 'massive' refers to the level of his douche-baggery, and not physical size.) right in front of me, roaring drunk and shouting obscene/obnoxious/nonsensical things and jumping into my conversations the whole time. I wont see it ruined the game for me, because for one, we won a pretty solid victory over a respectable team. Also, I met/got to chat with 3 cute girls!

OK, truth be told, it was 2 cute girls, and 1 semi-homely but very nice girl. The cutest one was wearing a baseball hat slightly cockeyed. super sexy. I'll get back to that.

I was gettin' my flirt on, but she slipped an "i have a boyfriend" somewhere in the convo, at which point i gave up and ended up chatting with her two friends and quietly brooding on ways to snuff the obnoxious spark of life that was the frat boy stumbling into me every few minutes.

Anyway, to celebrate our victory over the Spartans, we will be watching braveheart as previously stated (and for the record, i voted for 300, but everyone decided that they didn't want to watch a movie that idolizes the sissies we just humped up and down the football field. I DID point out that SPOILER ALERT all 300 spartans die at the end (with the exception of Faramir) however, seeing as Andy hasn't seen Braveheart still, i suppose we've made the right choice) followed by an epic journey quest to the Essen House to engage in a little activity i like to call

DAS BOOT

For those of you unfamiliar with this other manly tradition, they pour two liters of beer into a boot shaped mug MUCH LIKE THE ONE PICTURED HERE, and then we DRINK IT!! it's a little more complex than that, and there are certainly rules, but i'm not gonna go into it here. Feel free to ask me if curiosity is gnawing at you.

Once we are good and sloppy, i hope to convince everyone to go to the karaoke kid for some KARAOKE!! good times had by all and whatnot.

Just a quick question: were you guys able to follow that super long strange break in the paragraph about why we are watching braveheart instead of 300 tonight? because in hindsight... well, i'm not changing it, but it IS pretty convoluted.



OK, back to my sexy hat wearing girl comment. Here's the thing... i'm pretty crazy about girls who wear hats. i think it is SO cute!! I dont know the science behind it, but i know that i find them attractive.

This was the style of the cute girl at the football game. Though perhaps not the caliber.

Alright, i think that's all for me today friends!
See you on the morrow!!

First!!

Ok, so this is my first post, and furthermore my first attempt at blogging or keeping any sort of journal ever!! And in the interest of getting to things that i actually care to write about, i think i'll skip what was initially the temptation to introduce myself in gross detail.

For this post, it shall suffice to say that my name is Nick!
And people have on occassion labeled me brutally honest.

Last week i made a revelation. Well, to me it was a revelation. Maybe the rest of you have noticed, and in some small way i think i had too. However last week i realized that the following revelation bothered me.

People don't look at other people when they walk down the street. At least not in the eyes. As i did more research, what i decided was that people will eye one another up from a goodly distance away, picking out friends, acquaintances, and beautiful people, and deciding from 30 feet away or whatever the distance may be, will choose to acknowledge that you exist... or to not.

THAT BEING SAID!

Ive begun taking steps to fix what i percieve as a major problem. Because i need people to acknowledge me.

When people walk by determinedly staring in a direction that isn't MY direction, i do crazy things.

UP TO BUT NOT LIMITED BY
-staring intently at them
-overacting a double (or sometimes triple) take
-waving excitedly as though i'm an old friend
-cat calling
-moonwalking
-challenging them to an impromptu match of rock-paper-scissors ((-lizard-spock) bonus points if you get this reference!)

In addition to the absurd pleasure i get from making these people varying levels of uncomfortable, i get them to LOOK AT ME!

And now that I've achieved my goal, (and this is the crucial part) i smile. For several reasons!!
Firstly, I want to disarm them. After all, I've just made them jump through some WILD social hoops (making eye contact with perfect strangers is much less socially acceptable than it will be by the time i'm through). HOWEVER more importantly, i think my smile might be one of my better features. Moreover, people are more attractive when they smile (usually. There are a few notable exceptions, and the problem is your teeth. For those of you out there that are new to this whole 'getting into Nick's head' thing, take some KNOWLEDGE! i am attracted to good teeth. conversely, bad teeth are a huge turn off. it's kind of a big deal.)! And i want to be found attractive. Because

I AM SINGLE

as i blog this, my roommate Andy would like the world to know that he too is single. and if you want, you can come cuddle with us on the super bed. because there's totally a super bed. Ask us about our super bed.

Alright, so i went to work and when i came back i completely forgot where i was going with all of this, and it's Friday night besides! And i'm off to do friday night things!! SO... more tomorrow i guess!!